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Portly Mother Jokes Your mom’s so fat Tupac can’t even "Get Around" her¸ Your mother’s so fat she can’t even jump to a conlusion¸ Your mother’s so fat‚ when she dances the band skips¸ Your mom’s so fat‚ I have to take a bus a train and a cab just to get on her good side¸ Your mom’s so fat she had her ears pierced by harpoon¸ Your mother’s so fat her clothes have stretch marks¸ Your mom’s so fat‚ she has to hop the turnstile twice¸ Your mother’s so fat she needs a watch on both arms because she covers two time zones¸ Your mom’s so fat‚ she has two stomaches¸¸¸one for meats and one for vegetables¸ Your mother’s so fat she needs a hula hoop to keep up her socks¸ Your mother’s so fat when she goes to a restaurant she doesn’t get a menu‚ she gets an estimate¸ Your mother’s so fat‚ she sets off car alarms when she runs¸ Your mother’s so fat‚ when they used her underwear for bungee jumping‚ they hit the ground¸ Your mother’s so fat‚ when she goes to a restaurant she looks at the menu and says‚ "OK!" Your mother’s so fat‚ when she lays on the beach‚ people run around her yelling‚ "Free Willy!" Your mom’s so big‚ she plays Tiddly Winks with manhole covers¸ Your mom’s so big she plays marbles with planets¸ Your mom’s so big she tripped on the Alps and burned her lips on the sun¸ Your mom’s so big she has to wear a sock on each toe¸ Your mom’s so fat‚ her belt size is equator¸ Your mom’s so fat‚ they used the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping¸ Your mother’s so fat if she fell out of a tree she’d go straight to hell¸ Your mother’s so fat‚ when she fell in love she broke it¸ Your mother’s so fat‚ she has to buy two airline tickets¸ Your mother’s so fat‚ every time she puts an apple in her mouth people try to roast her¸ Your mother’s so fat‚ when she turns around they throw her a welcome back party¸ Your mother’s so fat she uses a satellite dish as a diaphragm¸ Your mother’s so fat‚ when she brought her dress to the cleaners they told her‚ "Sorry‚ we don’t do curtains¸"